Tuesday, 10 February 2009

Things can only get better...

At least when there is snow you can sort of understand what the delay is. It's a widely accepted fact that this country sold off its salt reserves along with the Gold by Brown so there is no wonder that this country comes to a stand still every time the temperature dips below zero.

But just when I thought the trouble on the tracks was over, this morning we were welcomed with flooding in Potters Bar. I've driven my car through many a large puddle so know it can be done...

But what really got to me and some fellow passengers is the announcement made by FCC: 'We are now on an emergency timetable'. To the unsuspecting, this seems innocent enough. But what it actually means is that FCC are taking no responsibility for the incident and that they will not be paying any ticket compensation; which is hugely frustrating as this morning's journey got me in to work 1hr 15 after I would normally...

Where is the justice in that? Surely this is the end, beau-tif-ful friend.....

Thursday, 15 January 2009

It's Contageous

It's Contagious

I must warn the local health authorities. And First Capital Connect. The mysterious millennium plus 9 bug struck down the Western half of the UK's rail networks. It was almost as if a well coordinated assault on lines North-West out of London had been executed with precision and accuracy. However, we know that's not what really happened. It was simply down to a very rare strain of the I125 Train Flu, which was supposed to be have been genetically modified in 1998 to prevent further outbreaks.

The rare strain appeared to have spread, by foot or mouth, to the historic City of Ely. This morning's 05:27 to London Kings Cross, a well-preserved specimen, was mysteriously struck down just South of Ely. This had disastrous effects on the 05:53, a vintage, and less popular year, which also appeared to catch the virus. It also meant that the occupants of said specimens had to disembark after a valiant combined attempt of the two specimens to limp on to Cambridge together failed.

I don't normally talk about the 'place' I work; I like to pretend that my office is in Ely but I enjoy a two hour trip to get there everyday, predominantly underground, from Ely. But one of my connecting specimens that was supposed to deliver me to my place of work (in Ely) also failed. Referred to affectionately as the Decidedly Late Railway, it also appeared to have been affected by the I125 Train Flu but hadn't made the effort to try and soldier on. I am starting to get a bit concerned that I am the common denominator. I was feeling a little 'fluey' yesterday although a drop of WD40 made me feel better. But if I haven't been adhering correctly to NHS guidelines on sneezing, I am worried that I have spread the virus up and down the Fen Line.

So if it is me, and not First Capital Connect's maintenance error, that has caused this whole kerfuffle today, I apologise whole heartedly and promise to cover my mouth in future.

Tuesday, 16 December 2008

It's Winter - Turn the Heating Off

I read an interesting article yesterday, which detailed the lengths that some companies are going to in order to realise savings during these economic hard times.

Some companies are still going for the traditional 'swathe' rationalisation mentality. i.e. lop off big chunks of an organisation, re-assign the work, sell the workers' desks and PCs and hope for the best. Others on the other hand, are examining all inputs, outputs and 'contribution' items or bits of a business, which cost money.

In order to translate this in to English, I witnessed the latter yesterday whilst on the 18:45 FCC train from Kings Cross to Kings Lynn. The train was decidedly 'split'. Those who sat on the left (facing the direction of travel) looked decidedly uncomfortable. Many were red-faced, fanning themselves and stripping down to their bare essentials.

On the contrary, those on the right were sat comfortably, reading, chatting, enjoying the wintery blackness out of the window. Occasionally dozing off only to be woken by the odd shudder of the train as it rattled round the right-hand bend in to Letchworth.

So what caused this divide? The plague? Had some cheeky adolescents put some itching powder on the seats of those on the left? Was it down to the work of God?

No. It was because FCC were trialing a new cost-efficiency lean six sigma bright idea. They had turned off the fans on the left hand side of the train but not the right. Thus reducing the amount of power need to run these systems by 50%. That is an ingenious saving if you think about it. Even if it did leave half the passengers red faced.

We could all learn from this…

Monday, 15 December 2008

Train Driver Jumped the Gun...?

An unexpected stopover in Kings Lynn mid-week meant that I had to catch the train I usually catch but half an hour earlier. I've caught it from Kings Lynn at the same time (05.53) before on many occassions but this time it was different...

As I parked my car in the car park at around 05.48 (5 minutes before my scheduled departure), I heard the familiar sound of a platform attendant blowing his whisltle (ooh er). This whistle blowing usually means that the train is ready for departure, at which point the doors are shut and the train departs. Of course, this wasn't what it meant, as I had checked the train times the night before and my train was definitely 05.53 and it was definitely 05.49 now. I therefore assumed that maybe it was part of a new rigorous train platform attendants collective training schedule, utilising the early mornings to rehearse their whistle blowing with 'live' trains. This can be very dangerous, as any training can be where a mock scenario can cause a live effect…

A mock scenario can cause a live effect indeed… As that is exactly what happened: I briskly walked from my car direct to the platform. This took all of about 20 seconds. The time now was 05.49.30 (ish). My thoughts were with the benefits that early morning training exercises offer; halcyon days came flooding back from when I once served as a Tank Commander in the Army and early mornings were spent tearing around the North German countryside on training exercises…with live ammunition… On this occasion the live ammunition proved to be the 05.53 from Kings Lynn to Kings Cross. As I walked on to the concourse with a spring in my step I was greeted by the platform attendant in full FCC uniform and whistle in mouth. Next to him stood the 05.53, engines running and windows already partially misted by passengers.

I had this immediate flashback of a torturous scenario I had once been in on a 'dry' live-firing tank exercise where I had to 'ghost' another tank as we hirtled down the ranges across the Bergen-Hohne countryside and the other tank fired. My orders were to follow the engagement sequence up until the point of firing: shouting 'bang' instead. Of course to my horror, my gunner had replaced the age-old military ammunition improvisation equipment of 'bang' with the extremely familiar 'put, put, put' of a 7.62mm Chain Gun firing 300 rounds a minute…

And on this occasion, the driver of the 05.53 had done exactly the same thing. As the 'in-training' platform attendant keenly blew his whislte, the driver mistook the training whistle for the real whistle (there's a tone pitch's difference, which only dogs can hear apparently) and shot out of the station quicker than Lewis Hamilton (the fastest man on 4 wheels) shot off the stage after coming second to Chris Hoy (the fastest man on 2 wheels) who won the BBC's Sports Personality of the Year on Saturday night.

Me: I was left amidst the diesel-fumed platform, briefcase in hand, next to the trainee conductor in shock horror… "the 05.53's leaving at 05.50 today!" he exclaimed, whistle still in between his teeth. The clock was 05:49.40… "Apparently so…" I replied…

It's Not Hard: But I'm Really Confused...

I think I must be going mad. I read a letter to the Editor of the Ely Standard from the Communications Manager at First Capital Connect that said they were reducing the number of intermediate stations between Kings Lynn and Kings Cross from the 14th December. This was also doucmented on their website (FCC).

It's now the 15th and the train stopped at the same stations this morning as it did pre-14/12 and the proposed journey home tonight appears to be unchanged too...

Have I missed something? Maybe the communcations manager at FCC needs a lesson in communications...?

Friday, 12 December 2008

Are Penalty Fares Fair?

I'm on a one-man mission to try and find out whether penalty fares are fair. First Capital Connect operates a penalty fare system whereby if someone does not a carry a valid ticket for the duration of their proposed journey, they will be charged £20 minimum.

Other rail operators such as the company, which provide the service between King's Cross and Hull, allow people to buy tickets on the train. My issue is that people do occasionally fall in to a situation where they do not have a valid ticket for their journey but the 'revenue protection officers' appear to penalise every time, without taking circumstances in to account. Therefore I think that they should revise their harsh rules and make situations more open. I'll happily give them a list of suggestions to make this a fool proof process.

As you can see FCC are extremely vague in their defnition and state you 'may' pay a penalty fare.

http://www.firstcapitalconnect.co.uk/Main.php?iCmsPageId=100

Can anyone clarify what the rules surrounding the 'may' are?

Meanwhile I will write to them and ask....

Wednesday, 10 December 2008

Wow: is that a folding bike?



They were my exact words when I first saw one on a train. They're compact, easy to fold (and un-fold) and not only save the commuter a tube or bus fare but also help keep fit!

The link below takes you to all sorts of folding bike deals...

http://www.discountbicycles.co.uk/biz/section.php?xSec=10&gclid=CPSIssHLtpcCFQ0xawodxkzHjg